Critical Investigation Learners Response

First draft comments From Sir ....

WWW: - you start really well and set the argument out effectively however you don't maintain it.

EBI: - Theories are a problem you mention several but many are incorrectly explained.
       - Footnotes/references: only 1 quotes will limit the grade you can get and some of your quotes are not reference. Both issues need sorting.  
       - You lose focus towards the end of both the issue an question.

Level/grade that I am aiming for in my second draft is a level 3. 

5 things that will help me achieve this.....

• By adding another 15 Footnotes to my essay as this will put me into a level 3.
• Fully reference all my footnotes and checking them for spelling mistakes. 
• Towards the end of my essay I lose focus so therefore i will be making some big changes in my last paragraphs.
• correct punctuations and grammer 
• The theories I used were not fully explained so therefore i will be making sure that on my second draft I correctly use my theories and add more details like defining what the theory is in general and the names of theorist.  

Wish List for BFI library trip
In this trip one I would like to have 

1. collected 5 new footnotes for my essay and this could be covering any theories issues and debates. 
2. I Also want to take away from the BFI particular in feminism and reality TV genre 
3.  More on audience theory - Cultivation Theory 

Linked production: ideas

For my linked production I will be working with Maram. Her critical investigation was about how Muslims were portrayed negatively in the media and my one was about Women represented negatively in reality TV shows. We have linked our critical investigation through the stereotype of an individual religion and the reality behind it. We are going to create the last 3 minute of a structural reality show called 'Young, Muslim and Rick'